Tag: anchors

Doing is key !

Do you remember how it was when you first started driving a car ?

You probably had to think about it so much and plan every move but now it is completely automatic, requires very little effort and is totally ingrained in your unconscious mind.

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That’s probably how it will be with starting to use an anchor. You are now taking the oars of your boat and it might take a little time to get into the rhythm of rowing. Don’t get discouraged if it feels a bit clunky or forced to begin with , it will soon embed in your unconscious mind and just become another part of your routine and life.

The thing is, for an anchor to really have an effect you must keep remembering and doing! It will only work if you use it and will only have a lasting effect if you keep on using it!

It’s just like eating. You have to keep on eating 2 or 3 times a day to nurture your body. We don’t say ‘ Oh well I ate last Tuesday and maybe I’ll be able to fit in another meal next week’ We don’t have to have an internal debate about it, we just know that we need regular nourishment for our bodies and arrange our lives that way. Somehow we don’t think the same way about our minds, perhaps its time to start now, why not start rowing your boat today!

I am a very visual person so it’s not surprising that my anchors tend to be pictures. You might be like Annie and find it is a smell or taste that affects you , or perhaps music is your anchor. One of the wonderful things about looking for your anchors is that you give yourself some focused attention and perhaps get to know the real you again. Would you like to hear about a couple of anchors I use on a daily basis. The first is these jelly fish at the Monterey Aquarium in California that are there every time I open my laptop.

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You don’t need to analyse and name all the positive feelings your anchor triggers in you. It is just enough to know that it makes you feel good but if I were pushed to analyse this perhaps it would be a mixture of peace and relaxation, being mesmerised by the beauty and movement of these wonderful creatures mixed with memories of an amazing holiday, exciting new experiences , the warmth of the sunshine and being with those I love. Every time I open my laptop and take a moment to stop and really look at this image I can be flooded with these wonderful feelings.

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The other is this Gustav Klimt picture which I have always loved. It hangs above my desk and every day as I sit down there I take another moment to really take in this picture. Again I never analyse the feelings it triggers but just appreciate the warm glow of peace, security, love, the powerful bond of mothering, the beauty of colours and all the other wonderful feelings it engenders.

Over the years I have come to realise that feeding myself with these good feelings daily is just as important as feeding myself with good food. Now that it is part of my everyday life I don’t need to think about it and can relax into what I am doing just as by eating a balanced diet with lots of fresh food means I don’t worry about getting each individual vitamin or nutrient. It just all becomes a natural part of a balanced life.

Health and wellbeing is not just something physical, not just the absence of disease. It is about finding balance in mind, body and spirit.

Shouldn’t that be something that comes naturally ? Well yes that would be great but there are so many competing stresses in our lives today that we might need to start off by putting in a little bit of effort to redress the balance. As you decide to take over the oars and row your own boat you might need to make some conscious changes but rest assured, just like the driving, this will soon become easy and automatic. Doing is key – why not start doing today, don’t you deserve to enjoy the positive feelings of balance in your life.

Life solutions in a cappuccino ?

Does this just look like a cup of coffee to you ?

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To my friend Annie it is the anchor that triggers wonderful feelings of being young, invincible, in love and that the world is full of endless possibilities and all that for only £2.35 at a local coffee shop ! Annie feels her cappuccino anchor has had a profound effect in her life and wanted me to share her story.

About 20 years ago feeling overwhelmed by a colicky baby, teetering on the brink of post natal depression and questioning whether she was in the right marriage and right job, Annie was given the unexpected chance to have a morning to herelf. At that time coffee shops weren’t as prevalent as they are now but near to where she lived there was an italian deli that had a small area at the back where they served coffee so she decided to go there for a bit of peace and quiet.

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As she opened the door the smell of coffee ( smell is one of the most evocative anchors you can use – but not so practical in a hypnotherapy session !) powerfully transported her back to ten years previously when following her A levels she had spent a glorious summer in Siena being an au pair to a sweet little girl called Gulia.

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The sun had shone everyday, she had fallen in love for the first time, and her eyes had been opened to a whole new world of possibility and opportunities.

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Most mornings in her few hours free of duties she would meet Marco in a cafe nearby, drink cappuccino in the sun and bask in these wonderful life affirming feelings. That rainy November day in a North London coffee shop, triggered by the smell of coffee, Annie got a glimpse of those wonderful feelings again.

Some might say that she began to feel better because the baby’s colic stopped, she started to get some sleep, changed her job and they managed to find a way through the marriage problems but Annie is convinced that her coffee shop experience was her turning point.

Realising that a simple cappuccino was a powerful anchor of good feelings that could help her live her life, Annie has made visiting a coffee shop by herself a regular part of her life and after 20 years you can imagine how strongly this pattern is ingrained. Now if Annie needs a top up of those feelings when facing a challenge at home or work she only needs to imagine sipping that cappuccino and they come flooding into her mind.

Annie found her anchor by accident and it would be wonderful if you did the same but do you really just want to leave it to chance? Don’t you want to take the oars and start rowing your own boat ? Can you see that your thoughts don’t always have to come from what is happening on the outside . Just like Annie, you could also find a way to tap into your own positive resourceful feelings from the inside. Is there a smell that is particularly evocative for you, the taste of a particular food, a piece of music. Can you relax and remember a time when you felt really good and anchor those feelings in an action like pressing your thumb and finger together.

How could you use this to open up your thinking and give yourself new internal resources to deal with any situation you may be facing. I love this quote by the Dalai Lama

‘The mind is like a parachute it works best when open’

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How can you open up your mind today and like Annie start using your thoughts to support you ?

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