Tag: change

What’s holding you back ?

What is holding you back in life ?

What’s stopping you achieving what you truly want?

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HOLDINGBACK

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It might be that you crave peace of mind, success in your work , contentment in the family, achievement in sport, weight loss or whatever else that is important to you.

If only wanting were enough surely you would have it by now, yet do you never seem able to get where you want to be?

What is it that is holding you back ?

Perhaps I can use the power of story telling and analogy, both powerful tools in a hypnotherapists tool box, to illustrate what might be going on.

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elephant 1

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Many countries with less stringent animal rights still use elephants as part of their circus acts. These huge majestic beasts are often tethered in the circus compound by a weak rope tied to a short stake in the ground. How is it that this can hold a huge adult elephant who should easily have the power to pull such a stake out of the ground.
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That is the power of conditioning !!
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tied baby elephant

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As a small cub the trainer tethers the elephant to the stake and however much he tries to pull the small elephant cannot get free. A powerful loop of conditioning is set up in the elephant’s brain. This becomes so effective that by the time he grows up the process is fixed and the belief so strong, he doesn’t even try to break free.

Can you see such how such conditioning could have been set down in your mind.

Are there beliefs from your past that are so fixed that you are not even aware of them ?

How can you break free of what is limiting you and harness the wonderful mechanism of your brain’s neuroplasticity, it’s power to change.

It is often said that the potential for change is in the power of the questions we ask ourselves.

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Question-Mark-1238452_46868173

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Would you like to shine the spotlight of awareness on the limiting beliefs of your past,

Start by asking yourself some good searching questions. Our excuses about why we are stuck is often a very good place to start.

After all no one argues that they haven’t grown out of the shoes and clothes they were made to wear as children and so can now choose their own individual style.
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school uniform

style

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In the same vein why hold onto old beliefs that you were also given in your past.

Today why not choose your own style in your beliefs as well !

Uncovering who you are

who you really are

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I love this quote from the author Steven Pressfield

“Our job in this lifetime is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it.”

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steve-pressfield-3

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and I think this could so equally be applied to hypnotherapy.

The job of hypnotherapy is not to help shape you into some ideal that you imagine you ought to be but instead to help you find out who you already are, and truly become that person .

How often are our goals about adding to our lives with an underlying unrecognised assumption that we are not enough. Therefore we need more money, success, achievements, a better body, more friends.

We have got so used to feeling we need more and that we continually need to improve that we only think this is a commendable attribute.

After all a whole industry of self help has even been built upon this !

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Change

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But what if all this were hiding who we really are and instead of helping us, is hindering us in living a life that would leave us feeling truly satisfied?

This doesn’t mean you have to stay where you are and not have goals or move forward but it is about understanding that the intention behind what we do can be the most powerful factor in our results.

What about changing the intention that underpins your life.

Could you live your life with the impetus to find out who you already are and then be that person rather than continually trying to improve yourself or mould yourself into someone you think you should be.

Your initial reaction might be surely I know who I am.

But really do you – how much is actual knowledge about yourself and how much is belief in old unexamined thoughts that might be actually untrue for you.

Letting go of your old repetitive patterns of thinking about yourself can be so powerful and make room for finding out who you really are and how you want to think. Hypnotherapy can be one of the means to start that process.

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repetitive thinking

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Such a change of direction in your thinking can lead to big changes in how you feel, act and ultimately your experience of your life.

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stress free life

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What are you waiting for ?

Where are you going ?

Where are you going or are you feeling stuck ?

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stuck in hole 2
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Do you want change in your life but are disappointed that whatever you try doesn’t work?

Is your experience that however hard you try things just seem to stay the same ?

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head against wall
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Could the solution be as simple as changing your focus ?

So many people come for hypnotherapy and describe very clearly and in great detail what they don’t want in their life but when I ask them what they do want they often find it very difficult to switch their focus and have clarity about their goals and direction.

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what do you want

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Focusing on what you don’t want is counterproductive. You end up holding on to what you really would rather leave in your past. It is like aimlessly walking around while continually looking over your shoulder, so its not surprising that you don’t get very far!

If you don’t have a destination in mind how can you be surprised that you journey is unfocused, unlikely to succeed just by accident and hence much more likely to fail.

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You don’t get to be slim by continually focusing on not wanting to be fat.
You don’t get to be happy by continually focusing on trying not to think negative thoughts.
You don’t get to be calm and peaceful by continually focusing on not wanting to be fearful.
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The unconscious mind doesn’t hear the ‘ not wanting ‘ bit and just hears
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be fat
think negative thoughts
be fearful !!!

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If you want to go to London, you won’t just get there by deciding you don’t want to be in Bristol and bumbling off, or if you do be prepared to perhaps only get as far as Bath. Of course Bath is a lovely place but a bit disappointing if what you really would like is a trip on the London Eye!
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London_Eye3

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london map

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Focusing on your end point is a really strong inspiration and drive for change.

Usain Bolt always has his eye on the finish ( not on the blocks he has just left ) to make sure he runs a successful steady race. Many sportsman visualise success as an integral part of their training process – why not model your behaviour and success on theirs.

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usain point

usain bolt

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Perhaps you could start to explore what success means for you. Not what you think other people would describe but what really inspires you. Visualising that success is a vitally important tool for change and one that is regularly used in hypnotherapy.

However what if you try but find it impossible to actually visualise yourself having the success that you want.

Then it would be useful to explore the resistance you are holding in your unconscious mind. Uncovering such feelings such as ‘I am not worthy’,’I am not good enough’,’I don’t deserve this’,’I am a failure’ and finding a way for the unconscious mind to let go of these and replace them with supportive beliefs is vital for any lasting change. Hypnotherapy could definitely help with this.

As with all essential truths this is nothing new but in fact age old knowledge. Socrates was saying exactly this in ancient times

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socrates_quote-1

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So why not change the way you go about things.

Look at what you want to change but very much as a means of helping you pin point what success looks and feels like for you. Then best foot forward and set out on your new journey this time with your clear destination in mind.

Good Luck and Bon Voyage !!

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